My head pulsed in pain as the sound of the people in Starbucks began to finally overstimulate me.
I made a tower of whip cream for a waiting customer and quickly handed it to Greg who was waiting for it, he gave it to the customer and then I sat down on a chair and rubbed my head.
"You are really not feeling good are you?" Greg looked at me with pity.
"Stop it, I'm fine... I'm just over working that's all. Its the holidays and I'm really trying to keep food in my stomach. Now I know what my mother met when she said 'Enjoy childhood while you have it Jazmine...'" I sighed, completely exhausted. And the holidays weren't over yet...
"You NEED to take the day off Jazz," He grabbed a chair and sat down next to me.
I looked at him skeptically. "Are you crazy? I NEED the money..." I snapped.
"Ok, you know what... I'm making you take the day off. I'll work your shift and mine." My eyes widened and I looked nervously at my co-workers.
"Greg... I still have to work for 3 more hours." I hissed.
"Yeah so? I have to work for 5 more hours, I just started my shift... no biggy." He shrugged, and smiled.
"I'm not making you suffer for my sake," I growled.
"Yes, you ARE." He pointed to my apron.
"Your going back to your dorm to hang out with Abby, its perfectly fine with me. I've got nothing else to do all day... I promise I'll work for the next 7 hours Jazz." He smiled reassuringly, I groaned and reluctantly took off my apron.
"Your digging yourself a hole..." I muttered.
"Doesn't matter to me, you need the break Jazz... you've been working for the past couple months almost every day of the week." Greg took my apron from me and folded it up and tossed it into my hands.
"Now I want you, to walk out that door and think of nothing but something fun to occupy yourself for the rest of the day. I don't want you even thinking about work or how you will do tomorrow... got it?" He gently pushed me towards the door.
"Sure, got it..." I rolled my eyes.
"Good, now go!" He waved me away, I smiled and waved and sauntered out the door.
I spun my key ring on my finger and listened to them jingle as I walked to my old silver dodge truck.
As soon as I got home I found Abby "studying" with her iPod in her ears; I rolled my eyes and grabbed a tin foil ball off the kitchen table and threw it at her. It hit her head and she nearly fell off the couch!
"Hey, your home early..." She stared at me with confusion.
"Yeah," I dropped my purse onto the table. "Greg practically shoved me out the door forcing me to take the rest of the day off, he's working my shift plus his." I let my head droop in her direction to watch her reaction.
She snickered. "Awe, what a sweetheart!" She grinned mischievously. "I think he has a crush on YOU Jazzy..." She giggled.
"Shut up!" I gasped, bolting to her and punching her arm. She laughed and shielded herself with her history textbook from another one of my blows.
I play fought with her for a few minutes and then laughed; I decided it was about time to cook something for dinner so I started searching for something to cook.
"Oh, Jazz... there's a message on the phone for you from your mom." Abby told me as she went into our bedroom.
I stopped what I was doing and stared at my hand reaching for the package of spaghetti and let what she just said register... my mom called? I shut the cupboard and went over to the dorm phone and clicked play on the messages.
"One new message Friday 1:46PM..." The automated message machine spoke robotically. It beeped and sure enough, my mom's voice filled my ears.
"Hey Jazz!" I smirked at her enthusiasm. "Well, I just hoped you were home or something but I guess your not... I wanted to just talk to you to hear your voice but anyways, the reason why I'm calling is because I was wondering if you were going to drive on back down here for Thanksgiving." I immediately froze as her voice kept on chattering.
"I know your probably not going to from what I've heard, so I've decided to make the descision for you. I know this sounds really bossy, but I REALLY want you to come down here for Thanksgiving. I miss you SO much Jazmine, and so does your brothers and father..." She sighed. "You'll probably say no, but I am going to pay for your trip down here anyway. There should be a check in the mail in the next day or so for you and Abby to get yourselves back home, I'm praying that Abby will somehow manage to drag your stubborn behind back to Humboldt. Anyway, you don't have to call back I guess... but at least have Abby call back. Hope I'll see you soon sweetheart... bye..." It beeped and I felt my face heat up.
"It's not what you think Jazmine! I know your about to blow up at me!" Abby defended herself from the other room.
I banged my forehead against the cupboard and moaned.
"Abigail Hailey, I said I can't!!!" I screamed, I kicked a chair... which I regretted because it brought pulsing pain to my foot.
"Jazz, come on!" She came into the kitchen and had that pleading innocent look on her face. "You know you want to," She gave me a critizising glare.
I looked at her pleadingly, but there was definitely a sign that she was not going to be persuaded otherwise not to pursue this.
"I honestly miss my family Abby! But I can't afford it, and just like my mom said I'm not accepting that money. I'm 19 for- geezes!!!" I groaned in frustration.
I looked at Abby's face and she was smiling of all things!
"What's so funny?" I snapped.
"Nothing... just that you have no choice in whether or not your going." She inspected her finger nails casually as I gaped at her.
"Since when do you have a say in what I do?" I stared at her, utterly shocked.
She grinned proudly. "I already talked to our boss, and Greg I might add, your going to Humboldt whether you want to or not. Either that or you sit around here with nothing to do but homework until January..." She sat in a chair and smiled.
I stared at her silently, that is the most conniving trick I've ever heard of...
"Your not mad are you?" She asked, sounding a little worried.
I shook my head and sighed. "I guess I can't be," I turned my back to her.
"Jazz, are you ok?" Abby talked slowly, and cautiously.
I chuckled and turned around to face her. "How can I be mad? I'm going back to the Redwoods!" I grinned, even though on the inside I was really kind of angry that they did this....
Abby grinned back. "Woohoo!" She pumped her fist and then hopped down off the chair to stand in front of me. We did our special handshake we made up in Junior high and laughed. "Redwoods here we come!" We hugged and I guess you could say that I'm still kind of ticked... but not really... alls well that ends well...
All I have to say is: "Look out Humboldt! CAUSE JAZZ IS IN DA HOUSE!"
Friday, December 4, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
Chapter I
"....my beloved James looked down at me with his breathtaking pieces of the sky eyes; no words left my tongue. All I could hear was the sound of my quickening heart beat, the sound of James heart beat was steady and slow. Like any normal slow heart beat...
I could not bring myself to say a single word to James, but alas, what could I say?
James' cheeks were turning scarlet, with embarrasment. I just stared up at him wide eyed; he had just confessed to me that he loves me. And all I could do was stand there like a fool and stare!
I felt his hand suddenly wrap around the back of my head ever so gently, he leaned in towards me and I found myself being kissed. I froze in..."
"Jazz, Jazz!" I looked up from my laptop and saw Abby running towards me and loudly shouting my name, interrupting my deep thoughts into my book "Forever Jessa" I giggled as the librarian shushed her harshly.
Abby quickly sprinted to me covering the rest of the space between us and sat down, hard, on the sofa I was reclining in.
"I've been looking for you everywhere! Why didn't you tell me you were coming to the library?" She talked like she'd had about five cups of coffee before she found me.
"Um... I always come here in the afternoon..." I blinked, holding back laughter at her jittery attitude.
"Oh whatever," She plowed ahead. "Anyway, I'm SO glad I found you! Guess what?!" A big blissful grin appeared on her tan face.
"What?" I smiled.
"I got the time off to go see my family back in Cali for Christmas and Thanksgiving!" She shrieked, the librarian glared at us.
She lowered her voice to an excited whisper. "Isn't that great?" Her feet danced while she was sitting, I couldn't help but smile at my best friends' excitement.
"Thats great Abby..." I grinned.
She stopped short. "Wait, didn't you ask for the time off?" Abby looked worried.
I shook my head, completely calm but a little disappointed. "I can't afford to go back Abbs..." I half smiled briefly; saving my book in Microsoft Word and closing my laptop lid. "I need to stay here anyway to study, I have a big midterm coming up in January, I want to be prepared..." I brushed my bangs out of my face.
"Oh..." Abby's face was a little shocked, I sighed.
"Come on, lets get back to our dorm..." I grabbed her hand and we walked out together, I checked out a book by Charles Dickens for school and made my way back to my dorm with Abby.
I guess I should explain my life currently; well, to start... I'm exactly 19 years old and I'm starting my second year in college come January. I'm working really hard to follow my dream of becoming a professional writer, I'm majoring in English Literature and I'm minoring in Photography.
I left home just after I turned 18 and moved to where I am now with Abby; Missoula Montana, the University of Montana. I left my 2 young brothers back at home, Isaiah should be just starting Junior High by now. And Dylon should be in his Sophomore year in High school...
And of course my parents, my older brother, Arty, however... he is about 2 years older than me which makes him 21. He went off to join the army immediately after he finished High school at 17; mom said she would never hear of any of her children going to the army but Arty wanted too protect our country.
And so he's been in the army ever since, I don't think any of us really liked the fact that he went off to join the army. He went to the east coast too, I think he went to North Carolina or something. But fortunately he met someone, a lovely young woman named Valerie, right at my age.
He just married her last year, and they are both still so in love.
I can tell you right now that my mom was EXTREMELY teary eyed at his wedding, I would be too. After all he IS the first born, and its hard to see your first child go off and grow up and get married.
But Val is great to my big brother, they love each other and even though he's always traveling they still talk whenever they can.
I secretely hope that they will have a kid soon so I can be an aunt...
As I grew up it was quite rough being in a house full of boys, my mom and I really enjoyed our little getaway's at the mall or a spa just to get away from all that noise.
I got more away time than she did though, she is the mom after all and she had to take care of my brothers who were very destructive (they still are as far as I know) with Arty around.
Growing up I was homeschooled most of the time, except for one day of the week when I took classes at my onsight Charter school Alder Grove with Abby and Paul. It was fun, but I liked being at home more... and being able to be at home gave me less distraction.
All I did in the morning was sleep in till 8, get up, eat breakfast, and get my schoolwork done while blasting music to drown out the sound of my brothers arguing. That was the life I have to say...
Now that I'm in college, its a lot more hectic. I have classes pretty much 24/7 during the week, I stop doing classes at around 6o'clock and usually I get back to my dorm and start studying. And then at around 7 on Tuesdays through Fridays I head off to work and do my shift till about 11o'clock at night.
And then I do about 5 hours on Sunday after church with Abby, thats the day that both of us work together at our favorite coffee company. Starbucks it THE best...
"Jazmine, are you sure you can't come? It'll be so lonely with out you..." Abby asked me again for the 10th time after we got back to our dorm.
I groaned in irritation. "Abby just like I said 10 times before, I have no way to get there... I can't afford it." I scrubbed the plate in my hands harder, not only was I a little irritated that Abby was bugging me about going. I honestly REALLY want to go back home... I miss those beautiful redwoods and the sweet fresh breeze of autumn caressing my face...
There were so many wonderful times back in Humboldt... I miss my beloved home more than I can put into words.
"Didn't your mom and dad offer to pay for your trip or something?" Abby asked, my face twisted... thats the last thing that I want. My parents butting in on this, so what if I can't come THIS year? I'll just put aside some money and come next year for Christmas...
Thats the thing that I hate about moving away, not being able to afford anything. My parents have offered to pay for me to get there but I declined; I really don't want them paying their money to get me there just so I can visit.
Watching Christmas morning on a webcam is as close as I ever get to back home, I literally haven't been back home in about two years, or more like a bajillion million years...
I glanced up at the clock and sighed, exhausted. Work... always sneaking up on me. Lucky for me I didn't inherit my dads personality for being "late", or as he calls it "fashionably late".
I'm surprised he hasn't gotten fired from his airplane captain job; he's been flying planes all over the country ever since I was a baby. Its neat to have a father that does that type of thing, mainly because he OWNS his own small plane, and he took me to quite a few states when I was around 7 or 8 and he let me sit in the cockpit with my play things to keep myself occupied.
I even got to sit in his lap when I was around 4 or 5.
Now the coolest thing about having a pilot for a dad; is that he actually taught me how to fly his small plane that he owns when I was fifteen. Now how COOL is that? Its really easy once you get the hang of it, I actually ended up getting an airplane license around sixteen.
But I haven't flown in a while, so I might be a little rusty. But I know the basic controls and stuff... but I've never flown a huge jet airplane. And I don't think I ever will, its a little frightening to be honest...
I pulled my brunette hair back into a pony tail and grabbed my "Starbucks coffee co" work uniform and tied it onto my full fledged woman body. Thinking back on how mildly gangly and uneven I looked back when I was in the tween and early teen years its rather funny; I've really evened out.
I've got my moms' "Birthing hips" as she calls them and my body has that typical hourglass figure for women now, and my arms and legs fit perfectly with the rest of my now 5'4" body.
And I'm not trying to be a self-esteemed buthead, but I honestly think that I've gotten a lot better looking then I looked back when I was a tween and teen. A couple guys asked me out a while back, but our relationship didn't last long... and it didn't last long enough to leave me completely heart broken and a zombie like most girls.
I'm not as stupid as guys think I am, which thats what happened to my past 2 boyfriends. We went out for at least 3 months at the max; and then they just completely and utterly dumped me like an old rag on the side of the road.
Harsh world, huh?
I wasn't upset though, it didn't feel right being around them. And being the oddball that I am, I've never actually had... a first kiss to be honest. I've gotten a one second peck on the cheek but thats it, no guy has ever really won my heart like I dream of.
Someday... I do want to get married. But I'm still young, and I've got plenty of time. Whatever God has in store for me I know that he will take care of me... whether I get married or not.
And because of my dating relationships, I tend to write about romance stories. Most of them aren't just romance though, too much romance makes me sick. I prefer horses... horses are the best.
That is to sum it up; what I write about: Horses, love, adventure, science fiction, and non-fiction. At times all mushed together in one big book, unfortunately I've been to chicken to send in some of my books. And Abby, being the encouraging BFF she is, she's practically gotten down on her knees and begged me to send them in to a publishing company.
But I'm waiting, waiting for the right time... I've been praying about it ever since I got into writing at around age 8. I really enjoy it, so many books have been kept in a big hope chest back in Humboldt that I wrote. My mom loves my stories and she loves going back and reading my little 4 page stories; it is a younger version of me, forever preserved in between each page.
And as I grow in God, mentally, and physically... the more involved and better I get at putting down my dreams, and thoughts into a nicely paced book about 400 too 600 pages long.
"Hey Jazz, could you take this order?" One of my co-workers, Jocie, looked at me pleadingly as the line of customers at the counter began increasing. I nodded and grabbed a headphone set with the microphone...
"Hello welcome to Starbucks, order whenever your ready..." I said politely. A feminine voice replied into the speaker box outside.
"Uh yeah, could I get a pumpkin spice latte please... and," She paused for a minute and I heard muffled voices on the other line. "And a peppermint mocha..." She finished.
"Will that be all?" I asked.
"Yup,"
I punched the orders into the computer. "All right $10.75 at the window, thank you..." I shut the headset off momentarily and turned to the window to get the money from the customers.
Currently only Abby, Jocie, and I are working... unfortunately. Practically everyone is gone for quite a while; visiting family or friends in other parts of the country for the holidays...
Jared should be coming in on his shift soon, and then Abby will be able to get off after Greg comes in about an hour. We've been on our feet and working for 3 hours straight now, and it's only Thursday at 5o'clock in the evening!
I won't be getting off for quite some time, Abby has shorter shifts than I do on Thursdays... I work pretty much full time here. I really want to get a better job, but this is paying my share of the rent for our dorm, and I am fortunately paying off slowly every penny I owe UM (University of Montana) for my tuition.
Working here at Starbucks is a fun job, in a way... sometimes its a little nervewracking. Every time I usually get off work, I have to go home and study. But most of the time I end up falling asleep studying, and then I have to rush to class...
Somehow I manage to get MOST of my schoolwork done; I'm pretty good at doing most of it now, before I pass out.
And I can tell ya right now that my parents are more then proud of their baby girl working hard to earn her degree and go to work doing several shifts a day in between classes earning money... being an adult is a hard life. Money, money, money... thats basically my mind during the day...
As for nightime, thats a different story...
About an hour later Greg came in to take over for Abby, she gave me a hug and told me she'd see me back at the dorms... I nodded and continued to make a strawberry frappuccino for a customer.
I could not bring myself to say a single word to James, but alas, what could I say?
James' cheeks were turning scarlet, with embarrasment. I just stared up at him wide eyed; he had just confessed to me that he loves me. And all I could do was stand there like a fool and stare!
I felt his hand suddenly wrap around the back of my head ever so gently, he leaned in towards me and I found myself being kissed. I froze in..."
"Jazz, Jazz!" I looked up from my laptop and saw Abby running towards me and loudly shouting my name, interrupting my deep thoughts into my book "Forever Jessa" I giggled as the librarian shushed her harshly.
Abby quickly sprinted to me covering the rest of the space between us and sat down, hard, on the sofa I was reclining in.
"I've been looking for you everywhere! Why didn't you tell me you were coming to the library?" She talked like she'd had about five cups of coffee before she found me.
"Um... I always come here in the afternoon..." I blinked, holding back laughter at her jittery attitude.
"Oh whatever," She plowed ahead. "Anyway, I'm SO glad I found you! Guess what?!" A big blissful grin appeared on her tan face.
"What?" I smiled.
"I got the time off to go see my family back in Cali for Christmas and Thanksgiving!" She shrieked, the librarian glared at us.
She lowered her voice to an excited whisper. "Isn't that great?" Her feet danced while she was sitting, I couldn't help but smile at my best friends' excitement.
"Thats great Abby..." I grinned.
She stopped short. "Wait, didn't you ask for the time off?" Abby looked worried.
I shook my head, completely calm but a little disappointed. "I can't afford to go back Abbs..." I half smiled briefly; saving my book in Microsoft Word and closing my laptop lid. "I need to stay here anyway to study, I have a big midterm coming up in January, I want to be prepared..." I brushed my bangs out of my face.
"Oh..." Abby's face was a little shocked, I sighed.
"Come on, lets get back to our dorm..." I grabbed her hand and we walked out together, I checked out a book by Charles Dickens for school and made my way back to my dorm with Abby.
*
I guess I should explain my life currently; well, to start... I'm exactly 19 years old and I'm starting my second year in college come January. I'm working really hard to follow my dream of becoming a professional writer, I'm majoring in English Literature and I'm minoring in Photography.
I left home just after I turned 18 and moved to where I am now with Abby; Missoula Montana, the University of Montana. I left my 2 young brothers back at home, Isaiah should be just starting Junior High by now. And Dylon should be in his Sophomore year in High school...
And of course my parents, my older brother, Arty, however... he is about 2 years older than me which makes him 21. He went off to join the army immediately after he finished High school at 17; mom said she would never hear of any of her children going to the army but Arty wanted too protect our country.
And so he's been in the army ever since, I don't think any of us really liked the fact that he went off to join the army. He went to the east coast too, I think he went to North Carolina or something. But fortunately he met someone, a lovely young woman named Valerie, right at my age.
He just married her last year, and they are both still so in love.
I can tell you right now that my mom was EXTREMELY teary eyed at his wedding, I would be too. After all he IS the first born, and its hard to see your first child go off and grow up and get married.
But Val is great to my big brother, they love each other and even though he's always traveling they still talk whenever they can.
I secretely hope that they will have a kid soon so I can be an aunt...
As I grew up it was quite rough being in a house full of boys, my mom and I really enjoyed our little getaway's at the mall or a spa just to get away from all that noise.
I got more away time than she did though, she is the mom after all and she had to take care of my brothers who were very destructive (they still are as far as I know) with Arty around.
Growing up I was homeschooled most of the time, except for one day of the week when I took classes at my onsight Charter school Alder Grove with Abby and Paul. It was fun, but I liked being at home more... and being able to be at home gave me less distraction.
All I did in the morning was sleep in till 8, get up, eat breakfast, and get my schoolwork done while blasting music to drown out the sound of my brothers arguing. That was the life I have to say...
Now that I'm in college, its a lot more hectic. I have classes pretty much 24/7 during the week, I stop doing classes at around 6o'clock and usually I get back to my dorm and start studying. And then at around 7 on Tuesdays through Fridays I head off to work and do my shift till about 11o'clock at night.
And then I do about 5 hours on Sunday after church with Abby, thats the day that both of us work together at our favorite coffee company. Starbucks it THE best...
"Jazmine, are you sure you can't come? It'll be so lonely with out you..." Abby asked me again for the 10th time after we got back to our dorm.
I groaned in irritation. "Abby just like I said 10 times before, I have no way to get there... I can't afford it." I scrubbed the plate in my hands harder, not only was I a little irritated that Abby was bugging me about going. I honestly REALLY want to go back home... I miss those beautiful redwoods and the sweet fresh breeze of autumn caressing my face...
There were so many wonderful times back in Humboldt... I miss my beloved home more than I can put into words.
"Didn't your mom and dad offer to pay for your trip or something?" Abby asked, my face twisted... thats the last thing that I want. My parents butting in on this, so what if I can't come THIS year? I'll just put aside some money and come next year for Christmas...
Thats the thing that I hate about moving away, not being able to afford anything. My parents have offered to pay for me to get there but I declined; I really don't want them paying their money to get me there just so I can visit.
Watching Christmas morning on a webcam is as close as I ever get to back home, I literally haven't been back home in about two years, or more like a bajillion million years...
I glanced up at the clock and sighed, exhausted. Work... always sneaking up on me. Lucky for me I didn't inherit my dads personality for being "late", or as he calls it "fashionably late".
I'm surprised he hasn't gotten fired from his airplane captain job; he's been flying planes all over the country ever since I was a baby. Its neat to have a father that does that type of thing, mainly because he OWNS his own small plane, and he took me to quite a few states when I was around 7 or 8 and he let me sit in the cockpit with my play things to keep myself occupied.
I even got to sit in his lap when I was around 4 or 5.
Now the coolest thing about having a pilot for a dad; is that he actually taught me how to fly his small plane that he owns when I was fifteen. Now how COOL is that? Its really easy once you get the hang of it, I actually ended up getting an airplane license around sixteen.
But I haven't flown in a while, so I might be a little rusty. But I know the basic controls and stuff... but I've never flown a huge jet airplane. And I don't think I ever will, its a little frightening to be honest...
I pulled my brunette hair back into a pony tail and grabbed my "Starbucks coffee co" work uniform and tied it onto my full fledged woman body. Thinking back on how mildly gangly and uneven I looked back when I was in the tween and early teen years its rather funny; I've really evened out.
I've got my moms' "Birthing hips" as she calls them and my body has that typical hourglass figure for women now, and my arms and legs fit perfectly with the rest of my now 5'4" body.
And I'm not trying to be a self-esteemed buthead, but I honestly think that I've gotten a lot better looking then I looked back when I was a tween and teen. A couple guys asked me out a while back, but our relationship didn't last long... and it didn't last long enough to leave me completely heart broken and a zombie like most girls.
I'm not as stupid as guys think I am, which thats what happened to my past 2 boyfriends. We went out for at least 3 months at the max; and then they just completely and utterly dumped me like an old rag on the side of the road.
Harsh world, huh?
I wasn't upset though, it didn't feel right being around them. And being the oddball that I am, I've never actually had... a first kiss to be honest. I've gotten a one second peck on the cheek but thats it, no guy has ever really won my heart like I dream of.
Someday... I do want to get married. But I'm still young, and I've got plenty of time. Whatever God has in store for me I know that he will take care of me... whether I get married or not.
And because of my dating relationships, I tend to write about romance stories. Most of them aren't just romance though, too much romance makes me sick. I prefer horses... horses are the best.
That is to sum it up; what I write about: Horses, love, adventure, science fiction, and non-fiction. At times all mushed together in one big book, unfortunately I've been to chicken to send in some of my books. And Abby, being the encouraging BFF she is, she's practically gotten down on her knees and begged me to send them in to a publishing company.
But I'm waiting, waiting for the right time... I've been praying about it ever since I got into writing at around age 8. I really enjoy it, so many books have been kept in a big hope chest back in Humboldt that I wrote. My mom loves my stories and she loves going back and reading my little 4 page stories; it is a younger version of me, forever preserved in between each page.
And as I grow in God, mentally, and physically... the more involved and better I get at putting down my dreams, and thoughts into a nicely paced book about 400 too 600 pages long.
"Hey Jazz, could you take this order?" One of my co-workers, Jocie, looked at me pleadingly as the line of customers at the counter began increasing. I nodded and grabbed a headphone set with the microphone...
"Hello welcome to Starbucks, order whenever your ready..." I said politely. A feminine voice replied into the speaker box outside.
"Uh yeah, could I get a pumpkin spice latte please... and," She paused for a minute and I heard muffled voices on the other line. "And a peppermint mocha..." She finished.
"Will that be all?" I asked.
"Yup,"
I punched the orders into the computer. "All right $10.75 at the window, thank you..." I shut the headset off momentarily and turned to the window to get the money from the customers.
Currently only Abby, Jocie, and I are working... unfortunately. Practically everyone is gone for quite a while; visiting family or friends in other parts of the country for the holidays...
Jared should be coming in on his shift soon, and then Abby will be able to get off after Greg comes in about an hour. We've been on our feet and working for 3 hours straight now, and it's only Thursday at 5o'clock in the evening!
I won't be getting off for quite some time, Abby has shorter shifts than I do on Thursdays... I work pretty much full time here. I really want to get a better job, but this is paying my share of the rent for our dorm, and I am fortunately paying off slowly every penny I owe UM (University of Montana) for my tuition.
Working here at Starbucks is a fun job, in a way... sometimes its a little nervewracking. Every time I usually get off work, I have to go home and study. But most of the time I end up falling asleep studying, and then I have to rush to class...
Somehow I manage to get MOST of my schoolwork done; I'm pretty good at doing most of it now, before I pass out.
And I can tell ya right now that my parents are more then proud of their baby girl working hard to earn her degree and go to work doing several shifts a day in between classes earning money... being an adult is a hard life. Money, money, money... thats basically my mind during the day...
As for nightime, thats a different story...
About an hour later Greg came in to take over for Abby, she gave me a hug and told me she'd see me back at the dorms... I nodded and continued to make a strawberry frappuccino for a customer.
*
The long shift finally ended and I grabbed a large cup of hot chocolate for the walk back to the school; luckily it really wasn't that long of a walk back to the school. I know my way around Missoula so well that I probably know my way around just as good as back home...
"Hey, can I have a hug before you leave?" Greg teased, with a funny grin on his face.
"Your a baby," I laughed, but I accepted a hug. I ruffled the sandy blonde head of hair of the college student and made my way back to my dorm...
Greg is in my World History class that I have to take to earn my major in English Literature.
When I arrived back home I found Abby in an extremely weird situation... ok first; she had no idea that I came home. And second; she had her iPod earbuds in her ears and she was literally dancing and rocking out all over the room.
I tapped her once and she nearly had a heart attack, she stared at me with huge eyes but she relaxed when she saw it was me. But she did look embarrassed, she shouldn't be... I rock out like she was just doing quite a lot. When she's not around anyway...
"Hey Jazz, how was work?" She asked, smiling prancing to the kitchen and handed me a bowl of Mac-N-Cheese.
"Great, hectic, but fun..." I snorted sarcastically. Abby rolled her eyes and shoved a mouthful of noodles in her mouth.
I kicked my shoes off and walked over to our little stereo and found our Brandon Heath CD "Give me your eyes", I put it into the stereo and pushed play. I skipped it to the song that the album was named after "Give me your eyes" and smiled as the beautiful voice of Brandon filled my ears.
"Give me your eyes for just one second, give me your eyes so I can see..." Abby sang perfectly in tune, I let my hair down and I grabbed my guitar and started playing with the song.
If anything was true about Abby and I, we both were very strong christian women. We both are crazy for God and all the amazing things he has done in our lives, if I'm not home in heaven yet... then he's not finished with me. And as long as I'm breathing I'll still believe in him and live for him...
And I guess you could say Ms. Abigail and I are definitely BFF's. After all, we've been friends since the playgroup days! I swear it seems like yesterday when mom took me to playgroup with baby Dylon and 6 year old Arty to play with other kids... thats when I met Abby...
"Mom! Why do I have to go!?" I screeched, I hated playgroup. No one ever wants to play with a chubby little girl like me...
"Jazmine Marie, enough!" Mom shot me an icy glare when I screamed.
"But momma,"
"AH! No buts Jazmine, your going and thats final..." She cut me off, Arty snickered beside me in his carseat. I glared at him and aimed a punch at his leg.
"Mom, Jazmine's trying to hit me!" He tattled, I flailed and screamed in frustration. Mom NEVER believes me or is nice to me! I hate her!!!
"Arthur, leave your sister alone! I WILL turn this car around if you act up again, you and your sister have ruined my patience!" She moaned, Dylon cooed quietly in his sleep on the other side of Arty, completely oblivious to my screaming and whining.
I pouted as mom drove to the park, my curly brunette bangs hanging in my face as the wind coming in from moms' window blew my hair around.
We arrived there and Arty immediately unbuckled himself and jumped out; grabbing the cooler for lunch and trying to drag it to one of the picnic benches where some of the moms were sitting with their little ones.
Mom unbuckled me and then grabbed Dylon's carseat, I liked being a big sister so far, even though Dylon is only a few weeks old. I didn't get to watch Dylon be born; I was outside singing to the birds with my grandparents and Arty while he played with his action figures.
"Come on Arty," She grabbed my hand and we walked towards the picnic benches, some moms waved and greeted my mom as she set the carseat down on one of the benches. She laughed and talked about things I didn't care about, I stood there silently really disappointed that I had to come today.
I would rather be at home and paint a picture or play with my Barbie's.
"Mom! Help me!" Arty groaned, trying to pull the cooler over the cement ledge that separated the grass from the parking lot.
"I'll be right back, Jazz could you please watch Dylon for me?" She asked turning to me, I nodded and crawled over to Dylon's carseat. I looked inside and he looked back at me with big brown eyes, he looked quite interested in me.
"Hi Dyl..." I giggled, I gently put my chubby finger in his tiny little hand. It's so amazing that he's so tiny, and its hard to believe I was a baby once.
Mom came back and Arty had run off somewhere with his friends; mom nursed Dylon while she talked with all her friends and I sat at her feet completely bored picking at the grass. I hummed quietly as I wiggled my feet in my white tennis shoes.
I picked at my jeans and white shirt, trying to think of something to do. But I don't want to go play with any of the girls that are playing with bubbles; it does look fun though. But then no one would talk to me, or they would all fall silent and not say a word.
I've run into kids that actually start whispering amongst themselves, or eventually wander off not asking me if I want to come along too.
It hurts a lot, I have no friends. The only friend I have is our cat Chazz back at home...
"Mom I'm bored..." I whined, staring up at her quite irritated. I hope that maybe when Dylon is older he'll actually play with me, I really wanted him to be a girl but that was crushed...
"Well Jazmine, go find something to play with... oh look," She smiled when she spotted the other little girls playing with bubbles; which I now realized that they look about Arty's age. Not mine...
"Those girls are blowing bubbles, why don't you go play with them?" I shook my head violently, making my curls bounce around. "If you don't want to go then that's fine, but you also can't sit here and complain about how your bored... either go play or sit here and don't complain." Mom told me sternly, I sighed making my curly bangs fly up.
The minutes went by, which seemed like hours as I watched everyone play and run... with out me. They were better off with out a stupid shy girl like me...
A red van pulled into the parking lot, I blinked as I watched a blonde woman get out of the van and go to the side doors. She opened the side door and a curly blonde haired girl hopped out, she looked really self concious, and she looked just about four or five years old, just about my age...
A couple other kids came out of that van, but I only looked at the little girl clinging to her moms jeans.
Her mom had the body of a young woman or an older teenager; the girl on the other hand... she was just as pretty as her mom, and she was a little skinny and her face looked scared. Her eyes were a bright hazel color, but really pretty...
They came towards the picnic tables and all the moms greeted the mother of the girl, all the other children had run off to play that came with the mother of the curly haired girl.
"Hi Jo!" My mom got up and hugged her, I blinked in surprise. The little girl hid behind her mother Jo and just watched with a freightened face.
"So hows the new baby Kathy?" Jo asked with a smile, I stared at Jo a little nervous about her touching my baby brother.
"He's doing absolutely wonderful, he's such a blessing to have around. He looks so much like his big brother..." Both of them chuckled, I stared at them quite confused. Why are adults so weird?
"Wow, I haven't seen her in so long..." Jo looked at me next, I just stared and kept silent.
"Hi Jazmine, you don't remember me but I was there at your birth..." Jo smiled at me, I blinked. "She's gotten to be such a beautiful little girl Kathy, she's definitely got your face and her fathers dark eyes and hair..." Jo giggled, I felt my cheeks heat up. Why was this strange person talking to me?
"Yes, she's definitely got her daddy's good looks. The dark eyes are one of the features I really adore of my husband..." Mom smiled sheepishly, Jo laughed.
"Momma, I wanna go home..." The little girl suddenly spoke.
Jo looked at her daughter. "We'll go home in a little while Abby, why don't you go play with your Barbie's and horses..." I pricked my ears up at the sound of "horses" I love those animals...
The little girl, Abby, frowned but went to the van and got a few toys and ran off a little ways away and sat down and started playing. I watched her play all alone with her toys, I wanted to play with someone so bad...
I decided I didn't have anything to lose so I followed after her and slowly sat down next to her.
She looked up at me and stared at me with frightened eyes, I forced myself to smile.
"Hi," I picked at the grass nervously. "My name is Jazmine, whats your name?" I looked up at her, she looked at me for a moment and then replied.
"My name is Abby," She blinked and turned back to her toys for a moment.
"Are those horses?" I asked, pointing to her toy ponies and horses.
"Uh huh," She nodded.
"I love horses... they're so pretty..." I smiled. Her face seem to light up, a smile spread over her face and she turned towards me.
"I love horses too," She paused. "Wanna play with me?" She held a horse towards me and my heart seem to flutter in excitement. I nodded and smiled happily, that moment we both clicked.
Ever since that day Abby and I have been best friends, inseprable... us and our horses...
I smiled as I sat on my bed studying, Abby saw my expression and smirked.
"What are YOU thinking about?" She asked, plopping down in front of me on my bed.
"Oh nothing, just how we met..." I giggled, it registered in her brain for a moment and she smiled.
"Yeah, so many awesome memories huh?" She chuckled, I nodded and closed my history book.
I climbed down from my bed and looked under the bed and found one of our old photo albums from elementary school, I opened it and started going down memory lane with Abby...
"Oh my gosh!" Both of us froze, we found the most shocking picture ever... a picture of Paul and us at like age 8!
"Dude! He's so little, just look at his cute smile!" Abby giggled, I stared at the picture... thats so amazing...
"He's such a beanpole in this photo..." I snorted in amusement.
Abby looked at it again. "Yeah! Your right, he's definitely not a beanpole anymore... he's got a huge shoulders and he's really tall!" Abby's eyes widened.
I smiled and looked at the cute picture of my best friend Paul; I haven't seen him in about 2 years... its really hard not seeing him he's such an awesome guy.
The last time I heard from him was when he was going off to college; as far as I know he's trying to get his masters in archeolgy. I've talked to him a couple times after he went off to college, but other then that I really haven't made contact with him at all.
He's about a year or so older then Abby and I, he's turning 20 on December 2nd.
Later that night after we finished looking at our photo album, Abby's cell phone rang and she smiled when she saw the caller ID.
"Heyyy Tyler!" She giggled, twisting a lock of her hair with her fingers. I rolled my eyes and went to get my pajamas on; in case I didn't tell you Abby DOES have a boyfriend; or should I say fiance. He goes to church every Sunday with us and her parents even approve, they've been dating for maybe about a year or so. I find it really amusing how she acts when she talks to him... I think they are both waiting until they graduate from college to get married.
I studied for about 2 hours and that's how long both of them talked on the phone, and apparantly from what I heard them talking about he's going with her back to Humboldt for at least Thanksgiving if not Christmas too.
It sounded more like he is just going for Thanksgiving though; he wants to go and visit his family in Washington.
"All right, so you'll just come on your own?" Abby asked Tyler on the other line, she smiled.
"Ok, yeah... bye love you..." She hung up and then crawled into her bed. "Tyler is going to be in Humboldt with me, are you sure your not going to come?" She asked again, I shook my head.
"I'm not going, I can't afford it... unless someone forces me to go and pays for the whole trip there and back I can't go..." I rolled over and closed my eyes.
"Good night Abbs..." I yawned. She chuckled, that made me nervous... that laugh wasn't an innocent one.
"Night Jazz..." She turned the light off and I fell asleep within minutes...
"Hey Jazz, how was work?" She asked, smiling prancing to the kitchen and handed me a bowl of Mac-N-Cheese.
"Great, hectic, but fun..." I snorted sarcastically. Abby rolled her eyes and shoved a mouthful of noodles in her mouth.
I kicked my shoes off and walked over to our little stereo and found our Brandon Heath CD "Give me your eyes", I put it into the stereo and pushed play. I skipped it to the song that the album was named after "Give me your eyes" and smiled as the beautiful voice of Brandon filled my ears.
"Give me your eyes for just one second, give me your eyes so I can see..." Abby sang perfectly in tune, I let my hair down and I grabbed my guitar and started playing with the song.
If anything was true about Abby and I, we both were very strong christian women. We both are crazy for God and all the amazing things he has done in our lives, if I'm not home in heaven yet... then he's not finished with me. And as long as I'm breathing I'll still believe in him and live for him...
And I guess you could say Ms. Abigail and I are definitely BFF's. After all, we've been friends since the playgroup days! I swear it seems like yesterday when mom took me to playgroup with baby Dylon and 6 year old Arty to play with other kids... thats when I met Abby...
"Mom! Why do I have to go!?" I screeched, I hated playgroup. No one ever wants to play with a chubby little girl like me...
"Jazmine Marie, enough!" Mom shot me an icy glare when I screamed.
"But momma,"
"AH! No buts Jazmine, your going and thats final..." She cut me off, Arty snickered beside me in his carseat. I glared at him and aimed a punch at his leg.
"Mom, Jazmine's trying to hit me!" He tattled, I flailed and screamed in frustration. Mom NEVER believes me or is nice to me! I hate her!!!
"Arthur, leave your sister alone! I WILL turn this car around if you act up again, you and your sister have ruined my patience!" She moaned, Dylon cooed quietly in his sleep on the other side of Arty, completely oblivious to my screaming and whining.
I pouted as mom drove to the park, my curly brunette bangs hanging in my face as the wind coming in from moms' window blew my hair around.
We arrived there and Arty immediately unbuckled himself and jumped out; grabbing the cooler for lunch and trying to drag it to one of the picnic benches where some of the moms were sitting with their little ones.
Mom unbuckled me and then grabbed Dylon's carseat, I liked being a big sister so far, even though Dylon is only a few weeks old. I didn't get to watch Dylon be born; I was outside singing to the birds with my grandparents and Arty while he played with his action figures.
"Come on Arty," She grabbed my hand and we walked towards the picnic benches, some moms waved and greeted my mom as she set the carseat down on one of the benches. She laughed and talked about things I didn't care about, I stood there silently really disappointed that I had to come today.
I would rather be at home and paint a picture or play with my Barbie's.
"Mom! Help me!" Arty groaned, trying to pull the cooler over the cement ledge that separated the grass from the parking lot.
"I'll be right back, Jazz could you please watch Dylon for me?" She asked turning to me, I nodded and crawled over to Dylon's carseat. I looked inside and he looked back at me with big brown eyes, he looked quite interested in me.
"Hi Dyl..." I giggled, I gently put my chubby finger in his tiny little hand. It's so amazing that he's so tiny, and its hard to believe I was a baby once.
Mom came back and Arty had run off somewhere with his friends; mom nursed Dylon while she talked with all her friends and I sat at her feet completely bored picking at the grass. I hummed quietly as I wiggled my feet in my white tennis shoes.
I picked at my jeans and white shirt, trying to think of something to do. But I don't want to go play with any of the girls that are playing with bubbles; it does look fun though. But then no one would talk to me, or they would all fall silent and not say a word.
I've run into kids that actually start whispering amongst themselves, or eventually wander off not asking me if I want to come along too.
It hurts a lot, I have no friends. The only friend I have is our cat Chazz back at home...
"Mom I'm bored..." I whined, staring up at her quite irritated. I hope that maybe when Dylon is older he'll actually play with me, I really wanted him to be a girl but that was crushed...
"Well Jazmine, go find something to play with... oh look," She smiled when she spotted the other little girls playing with bubbles; which I now realized that they look about Arty's age. Not mine...
"Those girls are blowing bubbles, why don't you go play with them?" I shook my head violently, making my curls bounce around. "If you don't want to go then that's fine, but you also can't sit here and complain about how your bored... either go play or sit here and don't complain." Mom told me sternly, I sighed making my curly bangs fly up.
The minutes went by, which seemed like hours as I watched everyone play and run... with out me. They were better off with out a stupid shy girl like me...
A red van pulled into the parking lot, I blinked as I watched a blonde woman get out of the van and go to the side doors. She opened the side door and a curly blonde haired girl hopped out, she looked really self concious, and she looked just about four or five years old, just about my age...
A couple other kids came out of that van, but I only looked at the little girl clinging to her moms jeans.
Her mom had the body of a young woman or an older teenager; the girl on the other hand... she was just as pretty as her mom, and she was a little skinny and her face looked scared. Her eyes were a bright hazel color, but really pretty...
They came towards the picnic tables and all the moms greeted the mother of the girl, all the other children had run off to play that came with the mother of the curly haired girl.
"Hi Jo!" My mom got up and hugged her, I blinked in surprise. The little girl hid behind her mother Jo and just watched with a freightened face.
"So hows the new baby Kathy?" Jo asked with a smile, I stared at Jo a little nervous about her touching my baby brother.
"He's doing absolutely wonderful, he's such a blessing to have around. He looks so much like his big brother..." Both of them chuckled, I stared at them quite confused. Why are adults so weird?
"Wow, I haven't seen her in so long..." Jo looked at me next, I just stared and kept silent.
"Hi Jazmine, you don't remember me but I was there at your birth..." Jo smiled at me, I blinked. "She's gotten to be such a beautiful little girl Kathy, she's definitely got your face and her fathers dark eyes and hair..." Jo giggled, I felt my cheeks heat up. Why was this strange person talking to me?
"Yes, she's definitely got her daddy's good looks. The dark eyes are one of the features I really adore of my husband..." Mom smiled sheepishly, Jo laughed.
"Momma, I wanna go home..." The little girl suddenly spoke.
Jo looked at her daughter. "We'll go home in a little while Abby, why don't you go play with your Barbie's and horses..." I pricked my ears up at the sound of "horses" I love those animals...
The little girl, Abby, frowned but went to the van and got a few toys and ran off a little ways away and sat down and started playing. I watched her play all alone with her toys, I wanted to play with someone so bad...
I decided I didn't have anything to lose so I followed after her and slowly sat down next to her.
She looked up at me and stared at me with frightened eyes, I forced myself to smile.
"Hi," I picked at the grass nervously. "My name is Jazmine, whats your name?" I looked up at her, she looked at me for a moment and then replied.
"My name is Abby," She blinked and turned back to her toys for a moment.
"Are those horses?" I asked, pointing to her toy ponies and horses.
"Uh huh," She nodded.
"I love horses... they're so pretty..." I smiled. Her face seem to light up, a smile spread over her face and she turned towards me.
"I love horses too," She paused. "Wanna play with me?" She held a horse towards me and my heart seem to flutter in excitement. I nodded and smiled happily, that moment we both clicked.
Ever since that day Abby and I have been best friends, inseprable... us and our horses...
I smiled as I sat on my bed studying, Abby saw my expression and smirked.
"What are YOU thinking about?" She asked, plopping down in front of me on my bed.
"Oh nothing, just how we met..." I giggled, it registered in her brain for a moment and she smiled.
"Yeah, so many awesome memories huh?" She chuckled, I nodded and closed my history book.
I climbed down from my bed and looked under the bed and found one of our old photo albums from elementary school, I opened it and started going down memory lane with Abby...
"Oh my gosh!" Both of us froze, we found the most shocking picture ever... a picture of Paul and us at like age 8!
"Dude! He's so little, just look at his cute smile!" Abby giggled, I stared at the picture... thats so amazing...
"He's such a beanpole in this photo..." I snorted in amusement.
Abby looked at it again. "Yeah! Your right, he's definitely not a beanpole anymore... he's got a huge shoulders and he's really tall!" Abby's eyes widened.
I smiled and looked at the cute picture of my best friend Paul; I haven't seen him in about 2 years... its really hard not seeing him he's such an awesome guy.
The last time I heard from him was when he was going off to college; as far as I know he's trying to get his masters in archeolgy. I've talked to him a couple times after he went off to college, but other then that I really haven't made contact with him at all.
He's about a year or so older then Abby and I, he's turning 20 on December 2nd.
Later that night after we finished looking at our photo album, Abby's cell phone rang and she smiled when she saw the caller ID.
"Heyyy Tyler!" She giggled, twisting a lock of her hair with her fingers. I rolled my eyes and went to get my pajamas on; in case I didn't tell you Abby DOES have a boyfriend; or should I say fiance. He goes to church every Sunday with us and her parents even approve, they've been dating for maybe about a year or so. I find it really amusing how she acts when she talks to him... I think they are both waiting until they graduate from college to get married.
I studied for about 2 hours and that's how long both of them talked on the phone, and apparantly from what I heard them talking about he's going with her back to Humboldt for at least Thanksgiving if not Christmas too.
It sounded more like he is just going for Thanksgiving though; he wants to go and visit his family in Washington.
"All right, so you'll just come on your own?" Abby asked Tyler on the other line, she smiled.
"Ok, yeah... bye love you..." She hung up and then crawled into her bed. "Tyler is going to be in Humboldt with me, are you sure your not going to come?" She asked again, I shook my head.
"I'm not going, I can't afford it... unless someone forces me to go and pays for the whole trip there and back I can't go..." I rolled over and closed my eyes.
"Good night Abbs..." I yawned. She chuckled, that made me nervous... that laugh wasn't an innocent one.
"Night Jazz..." She turned the light off and I fell asleep within minutes...
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Introduction
To my Lord and Savior for placing me in the wonderful family I have, and the great friends that he gave me...
I love you all so much :)
Many times, I've never really given thought to how our little planet Earth would end.
Many times I have ignored the fact that my time here on Earth was leaving me, faster than I ever will realize. Ever since my 13th birthday... I realized that my life was passing by so fast. And I knew that in 5 years I would be an adult, and I would be able to pursue whatever I pleased to do with my life.
Ever since that day, that 9th of May in 2005... the day that my best friends Abby, Paul, my parents, and my 4 brothers sang Happy Birthday to me, I knew that I had to make a good wish. After all I was finally a teenager...
"Go on make a wish sweetheart!" My mom gently pushed the cake towards me, I looked thoughtfully at the candles. I thought about everything I could ever want, every single thing went through my mind... finally I thought of something. I smiled and closed my eyes, I silently made my wish and then with one big breath I blew out the candles...
That is one birthday wish I will never forget... and one that I should never have made. I wished that the Earth would last forever and ever and always be a happy place... that was the wrong thing to think. Earth, is never a peaceful place...
I am a strong faithful young woman, following in the path of God as best as I can...
I am no celebrity, I am no famous woman, I am not known by anyone except my family and friends... I'm nothing special, I'm simple as can be... and where my freckles, brown eyes, and brunette hair lay... they shall be there till I die.
My name is Jazmine, Jazmine Marie O'Neil... and this... is my story...
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